When he agreed to take part in theIsland of the Famous Gian Maria Sainato he had taken into account that someone would turn up their nose, and so it happened. «In the fashion world with which I collaborate there is a certain prejudice towards television and I can say that, when I returned from the program, some work fell through. Television is very divisive: it gives you something but, at the same time, it takes it away from you.”comments Sainato, a content creator with 564 thousand followers on Instagram who, in 2023, experienced turbulent months not only due to his experience in Honduras – complete with homophobic barbs by the winner of the edition Marco Mazzoli -, but also for the sudden passing of his father Andrea, who drowned in Sapri on 29 August at just 59 years old. «It was a loss that destroyed me emotionally, even though dad was ill and suffered a lot. We were somehow prepared for the idea that sooner or later he would leave us, but we would never have thought of this”, says Gian Maria Sainato, who chooses to take advantage of this interview to inform those who follow him of an important problem which, even if by indirect means, he knew very well.
What relationship did he have with his father?
«Not very good, also because dad had a problem that neither I nor my family could accept. It was difficult to be close to him, not to mention that at the beginning I had several clashes with him also because of my sexual orientation: he struggled to accept me, we also split up because of this.”
Do you regret this departure?
«I feel remorse for not looking for him more, even if he didn’t do it with me either. However, we all wanted him to be treated.”
Cure from what?
«From the alcohol addiction he lived with. I choose to tell it now because I think it’s right to shine a light on all the people who are close to someone who suffers from addiction. My father refused to heal or get help, and the bottle was mostly to blame. I could only reproach him for not having had enough strength, but I would be unfair: addiction is bastard, it takes hold of someone, leading, in extreme cases, even to death.”
How old was he when his father fell into addiction?
«I was born when the problem already existed: it was very tough. People who suffer from addiction change you before your eyes.”
What do you remember about the day they told you that your father was no longer there?
«It was a bolt from the blue. They told me that he had gone for a swim in the sea with some friends and that he had brought fins and a towel with him. It was August, he was hot: we believe that he overworked himself and that the excessive effort caused him to have a heart attack or an illness. He hadn’t strayed too far from the shore, and that’s also why they immediately ran to get him, only there was nothing they could do. Because of his addiction, dad had developed an illness that had severely debilitated him.”
How did he react?
«From September to November I fell into a depression that prevented me from getting out of bed. My sister, who is a very strong girl, reacted, but I was confused and profoundly alone. Living in Milan in previous years led me to experience my father’s situation with a certain detachment, not to mention that my mother often didn’t tell me everything so as not to make me upset.”
What gave you the strength to get up from bed?
«Christmas, which is my favorite time of the year. After having put my work on stand-by for two months, I felt it was the right time to react, not to mention that I am a believer and that I thought I also owed it to my family, who has always been close to me. Thanks to my mother, the psychotherapist and the brands that started looking for me to collaborate together, I managed to get back on my feet and metabolize the mourning slowly, in my own time.”
How would you define the period following this pain?
«A rebirth. Some pain will never go away, and I don’t deny that very bad days still happen today in which sadness takes over, but I try to look forward and do it for the people I love. I have had happy moments with my father in the past, even if they weren’t many. I hold on to those, trying to push away negative thoughts as much as possible.”
Why did you choose to speak now?
«Because I would like all the people who know someone who suffers from addiction not to give up. I would like to tell them not to waste time and do whatever it takes to usher in a healing process. I would like them not to stop at no and not to believe when they are told that the addiction is no longer there: don’t trust, check and never let your guard down.”
If you agree, I would lighten the situation, reminding you that in 2023 you also had a good opportunity atIsland of the Famous.
«It was a tough experience that brought me one step away from the final, even if it took something away from me».
