But why do you Ligurians always moan?
«Because for us it is a form of breathing, you know those sighs of cows that oxygenate their brains in this way? Here, for us the grumbling, the moaning, is life.”
But he doesn’t grumble much, on the contrary. Dario Vergassola66 years old, an actor known everywhere but tenaciously attached to his Spezia (without the «La»), chats amiably for a couple of hours about Savona and the focaccia of Recco, about the whims of Paolo Villaggio and about that time that Faber …
Ligurian to the core, like a Taggiasca olive.
«But do you know why I wrote this book (Liguria, land of groans and beauty, for Mondadori Electa ed.)? To break this spell according to which we Ligurians never talk about each other except by insulting each other.”
But indeed. The most beautiful song about Genoa was written by Paolo Conte, who is from Asti.
«The problem is that beauty was a late invention in our country. We are mountain people, not sea people as many may think. Portofino and Santa Margherita, for example, have recently become luxury destinations, I remember when you could still buy a house there.”
And today you can’t stand tourists.
«In many treatises on psychiatry, luminaries have investigated the self-harm of tourists who book in Liguria».
But why?
«Because we are not used to it. The Cinque Terre was a poor place that then, at a certain point, became cool. Like the stones of Matera or the trulli in Puglia: places forgotten by God for decades and which today are unapproachable.”
You have a bad temper. In fact, if you think of two famous Ligurians, Paolo Villaggio or Fabrizio De André, you certainly don’t think of two “happy people”.
«And why Gino Paoli? Even on acid at one of his concerts, anyone dares to raise their hands and sing with him.”
She looks like Fiorello in comparison.
«Now I’ll tell you something incredible about Villaggio. We had done the Carabinieri drama together and one day I went to Rome. I met him sitting in a restaurant. He took my hand and started crying: “My wife left me and she took the dogs away, stay with me, I’m desperate.” I had an urgent job interview but I didn’t feel like abandoning him and so I stayed with him all afternoon, until his assistant arrived. I took the employee aside and told him that I was worried about Paolo and his reaction to his wife’s abandonment. The assistant looked at me in dismay: “But what abandonment, the lady is at home waiting for him”».
And why had Villaggio made that scene?
«Simply because he didn’t want to spend an afternoon alone. Eh, we Ligurians are shit…”.
But let’s move on to Faber. Did he know him?
«Yes, and I almost got a cuddle. Those were the golden years of the Tenco award, when one wanted to go even just to eat and drink with Guccini in the so-called “infirmary”, an eating area. Half the Tenco committee wanted me and the other half didn’t. However, I was still a labourer, mum didn’t even know I was going there because she would never have believed me. I had to do some sketches between one singer and another. I had just finished a number when I went backstage and in the dim light I literally bumped into a pale man, leaning against the wall and with a cigarette between his lips. I, with my hypochondriac anxiety, was about to end up in hospital, but he, Faber, didn’t bat an eyelid and just said “Hi”. And there I was about to have another cuddle.”
Why?
«But because I was an unknown laborer and Faber greeted me as if he knew me. It happened to me another time, when Gaber’s daughter confided in me that her father laughed like crazy at my shows. Here’s another thing about us Ligurians, especially us down-at-heel Ligurians: we never think we’re worth anything, we’re still those seventeen-year-olds who spent their days in front of the bar and around only concrete and cars, where women were a rarity among entomologists.”
The first time you fell in love?
«She was beautiful, very cultured, a girl who went to arthouse cinemas. So I started seeing all Kurosawa’s films – but without telling them at the bar otherwise they would have thought of a new blasphemy. The sister of this wonderful creature went to dance and so I, the first Ligurian male specimen, signed up for the modern dance course, wearing the costume, pretending to know Pina Bausch. I transformed myself for her.”
And how did it end?
“Very bad for her, because a misfortune happened to her.”
His wife Paola! And tell me, are you grumbling too?
«Here I am. But now I don’t pay attention to it anymore, because carbon dating would be needed to trace the day we got married.”
But poor thing, she has to put up with a hypochondriac like her, who reviews not restaurants but emergency rooms.
“But I’m charming.”
Let’s go back to Liguria: the inland paths are beautiful.
«It’s a shame that we Ligurians, as a joke, turn the warning signs upside down to deceive the “foreigner”, with the aim of making him lose himself in the mountains and convincing him by good manners to desist from exploring these territories, which will forever be hostile to him».
And so people come by car and have to deal with the nightmare of nightmares: parking.
«It seems that Freud, who, like everyone else, stayed in these parts, wrote his “Psyche und Parken in Ligurien” – translated into Italian as “Disorder of the psyche when looking for parking in Liguria” right here».
However, we all agree on focaccia, it is sublime like few things in the world. It’s just that few know how to really eat, can you explain that?
«With black caffe latte and so greasy that if the oil bubble doesn’t form on the cappuccino it’s not worth it. I remember the day I discovered focaccia: at my aunt’s house, the oven was opened and a smell came out which was a real initiation for me.”
Now that I think about it, another person who never complains is a true Savonese, Fabio Fazio.
«But he is a Ligurian who has evolved, he has cultivated contacts, he has grown since the days of “Quelli che il calcio”, when I also went on the show. He has made a career, not like us who are still here and defend ourselves from attacks. Once upon a time there were Goths and Heruls, then the hordes of Milanese and Piedmontese arrived armed with umbrellas and tanning creams. You see, in these parts, hiding out and defending yourself has always been the norm, an aspect that has contributed to our very unplayful character.”
In the book you talk about the Confraternity of the Ancient Belinoni Ligustici, a sect of atypical Ligurians who like to pay for dinners and spend money on useless things.
«We are very few, eh».
You can count yourself on the fingers of one hand…
«A small hand».
