Malta version of Dancing with the Stars (4), Albania cheap (5), Holland revelation (10), Angelina Mango amazing (9)

Malta version of Dancing with the Stars (4), Albania cheap (5), Holland revelation (10), Angelina Mango amazing (9)
Malta version of Dancing with the Stars (4), Albania cheap (5), Holland revelation (10), Angelina Mango amazing (9)

Everything is ready for the second semi-final of Eurovision 2024. Live from Malmo, sixteen singers will perform trying to gain a pass for the event on Saturday 11 May. In addition to Malta, Albania, Greece, Switzerland, the Czech Republic, Austria, Denmark, Armenia, Latvia, San Marino, Georgia, Belgium, Estonia, Israel, Norway, the Netherlands, France, Spain and Italy, not competing, will also perform because you have already qualified for the final. Below are our report cards, with all the best (and also the worst) of tonight’s performances.

Malta – Sarah Bonnici with “Loop”: 4

But is it the Eurovision Song Contest or Dancing with the Stars? At a certain point she actually stops singing and starts dancing – blindfolded, sadomasochistic – with the performers who accompany her on stage, including somersaults, lifts and so on. This also happens at the Malmö Arena.

Albania – Besa with “Titan”: 5

The performance is spectacular, with the play of light between the giant hands that appear on the screen in an almost three-dimensional version. But the song sounds like a cheap version of Angunn’s “Snow on the Sahara”.

Greece – Marina Satti with “Zari”: 5

A “kuduro dance” – remember the hit by the Puerto Rican Don Omar – but in a ballanic version. The effect is alienating. The ultratrash result.

Czech Republic – Aiko with “Pedestal”: 8

Punk attitude and energy: on stage it’s fire and flames. In the true sense of the word. And what a voice

France – Slimane with “Mon amour”: 6

It performs out of competition, because France – among the countries that founded the EBU together with Italy, Spain, the United Kingdom and Germany – is a rightful finalist. The song is the classic French song competing at Eurovision. An elegant, refined ballad. He takes himself too seriously in a context like that.

Austria – Kaleen with “We Will Rave”: 9

Long Ariana Grande style tail, metallic bodysuit like bionic woman. The song is a tacky 90s song that has no other ambitions than to be considered as such. And therefore it works.

Denmark – Saba with “Sand”: 7

She sings surrounded by fog, which recalls the sandstorm. At a certain point her alter ego on the big screen dissolves into a mini tornado of sand. The performance is more interesting than the song itself.

Armenia – Ladaniva with “Jako”: 4

On the stage of the Malmö Arena they recreate the atmosphere of a festival in an Armenian village. Folkloristic.

Switzerland – Nemo with “The Code”: 7

It mixes lyrical soprano warbles with rap verses. He sings wearing a skirt and a pink feathered dress – he said he is non-binary, that is, he does not recognize himself in the traditional man/woman distinction, and in interviews he asks to be called with the neutral pronoun they/them, or “them” – on a rotating platform. The song works though.

Latvia – Dons with “Hollow”: 5

Sing inside an illuminated ring. The song is a ballad with anxious rhythms that has little to do with the kitsch circus of Eurovision and risks going almost unnoticed.

Spain – Nebulossa with “Zorra”: 7

The Spanish Kylie Minogue – her name is Mery Bas, she comes from Alicante, she is 56 years old and makes up the Nebulossa duo together with her husband Mark Dasousa: in life they are hairdressers and how they ended up at Eurovision remains a mystery – she lets loose with her four-piece bass drum and the synthetic sounds of “Zorra”. We will see Nebulossa again in the final on Saturday, rightful finalists.

San Marino – Megara with “11:11”: 7

They stage a punk-rock fairy tale, with the dancers dressed as rabbits – half pink and half black – which look like a quote from “Donnie Darko”, the cult sci-fi film of the 90s. At least they are entertaining (but how nice would it have been to see Loredana Bertè with the “Madwoman” in Malmö? Hers).

Georgia – Nutsa Buzaladze with “Firefighter”: 4

Somebody call them, the firefighters. Everything is on fire here. It goes wild inside a cage of flames. The performance, epic, devours the song.

Belgium – Mustii with “Before the Party’s Over”: 3

He sings inside a cage of microphone stands, while the platform rotates. She seems to struggle a bit with getting the notes right. That’s an understatement.

Estonia – 5miinust & Puuluup with “(Nendest) narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi”: 8

Crazy and therefore irresistible. The song is a hit. The ballet must be learned by heart immediately.

Italy – Angelina Mango with “La noia”: 9

The performance is just a formality, because it is already qualified – by right – for Saturday’s final. The performance, curated by the German choreographer Mecnun Giasar, former right-hand man of Madonna, the Spanish pop star Rosalía and the South Korean BTS, takes up the concept of the song’s video. In the end she sings under a shower of fireworks like that of Maneskin’s “Zitti e Buoni”: let’s hope it’s a good omen.

Israel – Eden Golan with “Hurricane”: 7

Stoic: she carries on despite the boos, the “boo!” And the shouts that rise from the stands of the Malmö Arena (there are also those who, like at rehearsals, shout “Free Palestine!”). She, having ended up at the center of the storm, or rather, of the hurricane (to quote the title of her song), brings home a good performance.

Norway – Gåte with “Ulveham”: 5

The song and the performance wink at the Celtic world: it aspires to a form of epicness and manages to achieve it, even if the song is among the most boring.

Holland – Joost Klein with “Europapa”: 10

Be careful: he could overturn all the predictions – which on the eve saw the Croatian Baby Lasagna and the Swiss Nemo in the lead – and take home the victory. The song is about a young man who travels through various countries in Europe. There is also a verse in Italian: “Io sono in Italia”, he sings, on a basis that seems to come out of a 90s disco. “Europe-pa Europe-pa”. It’s not for anyone: it’s one of those rare cases that is so embarrassing as to be sublime. The real catchphrase of this edition (but the duck playing?).

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