Ignatius Pond
July 02, 2024
Luciano Spalletti loves to talk. Or rather, to be precise, he loves to talk too much. And so now that we know how it ended, now that the disaster with Switzerland is over, we have lined up all the bullshit that came out of the mouth of our coach from Certaldo in the 24 hours that preceded the most stinging elimination ever from an international tournament like the European Championship. They range from “playing with a right foot on the right and a left foot on the left” to Buffon’s speech on the bus that, again according to our coach, would have excited the Italian eleven. So here below are the absolute masterpieces of Spalletti’s national team rhetoric nonsense.
Right to right, left to left
“Mancini plays in place of Calafiori, he has the right experience. It’s better to play with a right-footer on the right and a left-footer on the left.”
Super-bomber Scamacca
“Doubt Scamacca-Retegui? Gianluca can score goals, he has a shot that I have struggled to see in others I have coached. Scamacca is a very clear player. He can score at any time, he has that quality and that flair, those flashes that tear you apart in that moment”.
Team disbanded after passing the group
“We know, from what we have seen and from what is direct knowledge, he has quality and strength, important players at international level like Xhaka. But these are all things that are part of the level that we can show, manage with our quality. To make the Italians proud we definitely have to do something better. I expect a more relaxed team after the group passed”.
Buffon’s speech on the 2006 World Cup final
“We had Buffon on the bus with us and he told us about 2006. He made us relive that emotion. We know that we also have this match to honor. A greater responsibility, as is knowing that we have fans all over the world, even in Brazil. We feel the affection of our fans even if they are not present”.
Sure to go behind the line
“We can definitely get behind the line. They also have fast attacks: if you’re not ready it becomes difficult to think.”
The human “shanghai” and beautiful things
“Seeing them like that in that human mess after scoring a goal is something that stays with you. I’m sure I’ll see beautiful things again.”
Oh, whoever wins goes through
“Also because we’ll go to the next round if we manage to win this match, otherwise we won’t go.”
Ah, the one who is not accredited wins
“The results say it: there were teams that got through the round very well, even if they were not accredited, and this says a lot about the difficulty of playing at any difficulty.”
Ready and well trained
“It will be a do-or-die game against Switzerland, we will have to manage the ball in a different way and we trained very well. We know the importance of the game and we will definitely be ready.”
They all seem to be penalty takers, we can rest assured
“The penalty taker is the one who is able to manage the emotion well when it happens. We let everyone take penalties, but it’s not an ideal solution if we already think about it… If you try too many penalties, if you take them all well, I don’t know. In these days here, everyone’s penalties have gone in, they all seemed like penalty takers”.
In the heart of the competition
“The fact that you are now in the heart of the competition because you have qualified gives you that level that you must always show because there is no alternative.”
No drops in tension at the beginning of the second half, please
“This qualification that came at the last second, which in my opinion is deserved, must however make us think that we cannot allow ourselves those drops in tension like we had at the beginning of the second half, in certain moments of the matches”.
We saw nothing of this.
